I am aware that this may appear to be a rather obnoxious title. So
first let me indicate my credentials. I met my wife at a Christian
Workers party on the evening of Christmas Day, which ran over into
the first hour or two of Boxing (or St Stephen's) Day. We were married
exactly one year to the day later.

As I write, we are coming up to our fiftieth wedding anniversary.
Still together. Still having our periodic differences. But still
loving each other. So I do feel that, without any sense of superiority,
for many others have achieved the same, that I do have grounds for
reflecting on why some marriages succeed and others fail.

THE ECONOMIC DISINCENTIVES TO MARRIAGE
260 years ago capitalism, based on the newly emerging market system,
was just beginning to develop. A philosopher of the time, Adam Smith,
acutely observed in "The Wealth Of Nations", that the new system
depended crucially on the selfishness of participating businessmen.
It only worked effectively if each of them selfishly pursued his own
interests irrespective of the needs or suffering of others.

Eventually it  became clear was that the characteristics of markets for
products and services transfer themselves into the markets for the  human
labour which produces them, whether the labour is unskilled or highly
skilled. But since better trained manpower earns more than less trained,
competition also became part of the market for education, training and
so forth. Which is why we always attach grades to such qualifications.   

Thus people, whether entrepreneurs or hired manpower, came to spend
a large proportion of their day in severe competition with one another
i.e. in selfish pursuit of their own interests. Now, it is a basic feature
of human psychology that, if a major part of one's life is spent acting in
a particular way, that behaviour is almost impossible to "turn off" at the
end of the day. Hence people are socialised into attitudes of selfishness.
Such characteristics inevitably emerge also in marriage.                 

REINFORCING SOCIETAL CHANGES
In times when women were more subservient than today, and when divorce
was socially difficult, these forces were largely contained. But over time
women gained political freedom, far greater educational and, consequently,
much expanded employment opportunities. Plus, they were thus able more easily
to assert their own preferences -- in marriage as elsewhere. And in the 1950's
the "Pill" removed the monthly fear of pregnancy and gave far greater sexual
freedom. Women gained greater access to labour markets and, because of the
"Pill", could keep jobs longer. But they found themselves subject to the same
character-defining forces which increased the personal selfishness of men.
The very same conditions for success which apply to men in the employment market
also apply with the same degree of strictness to women.

The consequences of all this for the decreasing longevity of marriage hardly
need to be emphasised. And they are mirror in all economic system founded
on market capitalism.                                              

THE CONTRIBUTION OF DECREASING CHRISTIAN INFLUENCE IN WESTERN ECONOMIES
Despite obvious advances in man's (in a generic sense) intellectual
capabilities, he remains able to give prolonged attention to only
a limited range of objectives. Sometimes the limit is one. Thus
increasing employment demands as jobs become more complex and competitive
inevitably restrict his capability to give sufficient attention other things
in life, such as marriage -- or to God!

The vast increases in material well being, which have been such a long
term feature of market capitalism, have not only fed the selfish desires
of men but have also increased them. Thus the focus on materialism not
only tends to demand the sacrifice of interpersonal relationships, as in
marriage and family life, but also in the individual's relationship with God.

Thus the will and desires of a loving God, which are always designed to
enhance the long term benefit of man, are systematically relegated to
the bottom of a pile of short term objectives which actually destroy
his long term best interests.

MORE OF THE SAME
The system contributed even more. This is because the essence and viability
of market capitalism is determined by profit.

Early capitalists found their insatiable craving for profit was not
being satisfied. They found two solutions. The first was to increase sales by
reducing the useful life of their products. This became endemic to
the system. Secondly, and much more deviously, they developed an existing
kind of selfishness expressed in terms of fashion. When a firm's profits could
not be increased by inferiorising its output, the effective life of the product
could always, easily and drastically be reduced by advertising that it was now

unfashionable. The physchological consequences were immense, not least for marriage.

Moreover, these intensified the short termism of people's attitudes. "Live for today"
is, in fact, neither Christian nor sensible nor conducive to the long term
survival of marriage. Taken together, these factors, inseparable from the system,
account in large measure for the decline of marriage as an attractive relationship
and as an arrangement with longer term viability.

AUTHOR: Anthony Keith Whitehead
WEB SITE: http://www.christianword.co.uk
This article is copyright but may be reproduced providing that all this information is included.
Over twentyfive years in Christian healing teaching writing ministries. Wide range of secular employments before being called by the Lord into full time independent ministry in 1987. With his
wife Iris he has ministered both in the UK and USA. Has written many articles and several books on healing meditation, empowerment, salvation and various aspects of spirituality.
Formal qualifications include: B.A., M.Phil.,
Cambridge University Certificate in Religious Studies Post Grad Cert in Education.